I Know Chuck Heston, and You're No Chuck Heston

The Passion of the Christ (2004)

Starring: Robert Deniro, Frida Kahlo Directed by: Martin Scorcese Rating: R Genre: Drama Other

Review Yikes! Marty Scorcese's bloody tribute to the Greatest Man On Earth is a cross between Bulldog Durham and Taxi Drivers. If the Master's last day at the office was really this bad, then I hope they give validation in heaven. Did Heston do it better? Of course he did, but with that said, DeNiro is riveting as the King of Kings, who braved the wrath of his own people to save them from God's wrath so that we could all be guilty in the eyes of the Lord. Gorgeous Frida Kahlo plays Jesus' sister Mary Magdalene and, while she seems a might slutty to be related to the Man Who Walked On Water, I think I get the point. And I'm sure you will too, if you're willing to wade into this hellish abbatoir in the spirit with which it was intended you should. But keep the kids and nervous pets away from the screen or they're likely to have some unsettling questions for the Sunday school teacher. If you do watch, be sure to check out the DVD extras, including a well-considered documentary on why the Jews who run Hollywood should not be offended, and a rather odd short on the making of pita bread.